Sometimes I start to waver. A little voice in my mind tells me that I can't do it. That I'll never make it. I can run and eat veggies and stretch and sweat all I want, but I'll always be frumpy, fat and unhappy.
Today I let that little voice nag on my nerves. I woke up on my bonus day off with a brutal red, sore eye and had to skip the gym. I couldn't read, I couldn't watch tv, I couldn't surf the internet. I was sad, I was disappointed, and three hours in to my pity party, I was starving. I downed a chocolate bar, a frozen entree, a diet coke - and I stopped. Eating a boatload of junk wasn't going to make me feel any better, was it?
I closed the shades, I put on some inspiring TV on the computer, and I waited until I could see again. Only 6 hours :)
And in that period of time, I thought a lot about myself. I'm not fat. I'm working on the happy thing. But the frumpy?
This is the Megan everyone sees on the outside. These are two examples of my day-to-day, regular appearance. Not awful, but not that inspiring. It's obvious I don't love the way I look. Pretty frumptastic!
But guys, that's not who I feel like. I catch myself in the mirror and I'm proud of my slimmer waist and long legs, but I just don't feel sassy.
This is who I feel like on the inside. And now it's what I look like on the outside.
3 more pounds and I'll have some new clothes. 40 more pounds and I'll have an entirely new body. But today, all it took was an irritated eye, a disappointing day, and 6 fewer inches of hair to get a whole new attitude.