Monday, September 13, 2010

Wondering about...

One of the things I love doing with my downtime is browsing through cookbooks and cooking websites. I love reading recipes, looking at gorgeous food photography, and dreaming about what I'd like to serve at imaginary tea parties, brunches, and dinners. But I'll be the first to admit that most of the recipes I drool over aren't exactly diet recipes - they're decadent, rich biscuits, creamy sauces, crisp and juicy roasted meats, and sweet baked goods. This summer, I fantasized about making homemade vanilla sugar cookies and sandwiching orange sherbet between them for DAYS after reading about it on a blog.

That just isn't right, people. I should be fantasizing about running off to a deserted tropical island with my boyfriend, not desserts.
Can there be a balance between eating to lose weight and eating for pleasure? I love to cook and try new recipes, and I've been enjoying the challenge of creating healthy, low-point meals for our little family of two, but sometimes I really just want to bust out the butter.
Yes, I could bake and braise and cook to my heart's content and then give it away, but I love eating and I'm selfish. Those ingredients can get pricey and we're on a tight budget, and if I'm going to make a 30-step pie, I want to eat the damn thing.
So for now, I don't. I don't make cornbread and slow-cooked brisket, I don't make soft, fluffy biscuits and jam and cream, and I don't bake elaborate cakes and cookies and pies. It makes me a little sad. Do you think the day will come when I'll be able to just let go a little bit and bake (and eat) without feeling guilty? Probably not if I want to get to my goal and stay there.


Katy said...

I just watched a really low budget movie about veganism and she had some great looking recipies. One was called "orange pudding" although no oranges were harmed in the making. It was brown rice, sweet potato, nutmeg, cinnamon, vanilla and vanilla soy/rice milk...all food processed. She gave no measurements, but it was one long thin sweet potato, cooked, what looked like 3 cups of cooked brown rice, splash of vanilla, maybe a cup of soymilk and a dash of the spices...all about the texture. I'm going to try it this week. I get excited about reading my cooks magazine and wish I could make some of that stuff too. I indulge my baking habit once and a while and make the recipe healthier. Last night I made oatmeal chocolate chip cookies with whole wheat and TONS of choc chips. Not healthy, but I feel good about trying and really...I just love baking.

Jams said...

Eventually you will get to the point where you can bake and eat without the guilt. It's a process... Holidays are a good time to practice, you can make stuff for people and "taste" it to make sure it's good. Can't feel guilty about that! ;) Baby steps...

You can do this!

Jams said...
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RescuingLisa said...

Wow - I am going through the same thing right now - dreaming about decadent foods, but not allowing myself to have anything.

It just flat out sucks.

I am thinking about trying the eat shrink and be merry cookbook - I think it may have a balance between the two - while still being healthy.

I wish I had an answer for us - because it's really buggin' me too!

Deb said...

This is a topic that hurts me a bit to think about. Every other time I've lost weight, I've believed that I will be able to go back and still love baking (and eating) in moderation.

I hate to say it, but I think this is one of the big things that has thrown me off and caused me to regain my weight.

I can love food all I want, but the fact is, food doesn't love me back.

I do find satisfaction in making healthy meals. I bake a bit, usually with my kids, and at least semi healthy things. I make a great pie, and that'll happen a couple times a year, only when there will be sufficient people to eat it. My more decadent treats will only be made if I'm taking them to a potluck and leaving the leftovers behind.

BUT, I have concluded that I will never again fill my house with Christmas baking. I will never again be making the ultra decadent types of baking just for the sake of having them around my house.

Because, I honestly believe that I will never be strong enough to do it. Even once I have maintained an ideal weight for years and done an ironman, I honestly don't think that is a temptation I will be able to allow in my house on any kind of regular basis.

I've tried to replace my love of food and preparation of food with other things, and I've at least partly succeeded. I'm an addict though and years of experience have taught me that it's just not good for me to allow my addiction too much leeway in my life.

Erin said...

It's important to find balance. I sometimes treat a few pricy ingredients as a reward splurge. I love to cook and bake as well and am building a big repotoire of healthy, delicious meals that my hubby loves! Don't give up, it's all about BALANCE :) It's important to treat yourself well and feed your body nutitious things, not just diet junk. You are doing great!

Meg said...

I like all of the ideas about exploring recipes that still have some kind of healthy merit. I love low-fat cookbooks, too, and some of the things I've made recently (ratatouille, for example) have been way better and more fun to make and serve than a full-fat extravaganza.

Deb, what you said about not ever being able to fill the house with Christmas cookies really hit home for me. I think a post is in order...

SherRon, Shoes To Lose said...

Meg- I know what you mean. I love to cook myself but the fun stuff to make is always the stuff that isn't as good for you.

I have several healthy cookbooks and I try to spend most of my time in them. I know I can't do too much damage there.

When I want to make something really sinful, I wait until a party or a family get together is coming up. Then I know I won't be eating the whole thing and sharing is always nice.

Sonya @ Eyes on the Hourglass said...

You never know dear, stranger things have happened. I never in a million years thought I'd be able to buy a carton of ice cream and have it last more than a day and a half. Never. Now I have one sitting in my freezer and it's been there for more than a week!

I'm proof that anything is possible! You never know, maybe one day you'll be able to make those recipes and eat those items slowly over time. Just know it's possible!